The Search For Meths

It doesn’t look to be a good day to cycle, it’s very icy out, and so it’s the car today. Looking at the weather forecast it doesn’t look like it’s going to be good week to cycle at all or to run for that matter.

Top of my shopping list for the usual sojourn to Sainsbury’s is whisky, dark rum and meths. I sound like a right alkie. The first two are for the notorious eggnog, the latter for tonights almost as notorious cheese fondue. Notorious because the last time we did one the ceramic fondue bowl exploded spilling molten cheese everywhere. Whilst everyone ran around in a mad panic attempting to mop up the mess, Son was doing his own mopping up and finishing off the debris. Tonight we’ll be using metal fondue pots.

Thing is we have a bit of a fuel problem; it runs on methylated spirit and just where do you get meths from these days? Sainsbury’s hadn’t got any; they suggested I try white spirit which I’m not sure would work, unless we’re looking to repeat the explosion. Apparently B&Q sell it, so their website says. I might have to detour there on my way home but then, before I get chance, L saves the day with the help of good old Wilko.

She’s also acquired some mince pie flavoured candles, to mask the smell of wet dog that pervades everywhere at home. I just hope we don’t replace that with the smell of burning mince pies instead. As it happens, the smell of warm melted, burning itself to the bottom of the fondue pot, cheese masks everything.

The fondue, despite being a little burnt, goes down well but it’s not as impressive as L’s Kaiserschmarren, which is something else we’ve discovered on our alpine travels, which are basically diced pancakes and a great lunchtime pick me up after a morning on the ski slopes. They’re also not too bad after a slither along our icy streets either.



If anyone’s had too much cheese fondue and Kaiserschmarren, bear in mind it’s also the 4th Annual Global Orgasm Day for Peace, which coincides with the first day of the Winter Solstice. The aim, ‘to effect positive change in the energy field of the Earth through input of the largest possible instantaneous surge of human biological, mental and spiritual energy’, apparently. So go for it, any time in a 24-hour period from 5.47am on the 21st will do. I don’t know, one day people power and Rage Against The Machine, today this.